Bad Poetry

by Brendan Smith
Weirs Times Editor

I Turned On The News
To See What Was What
I Heard People Telling Me
Who Was Good And Who’s Not

There Were Less Drug Commercials
Which At First Made Me Pleased
But Now Too Many Messages
About Which Politician Was A Sleaze

There Was A Plethora Of Ads
For Maggie, Chris And Don
As Well As For Karoline
They Went On And On And On

No One Said
What They Would Actually Do
They Only Yapped That The Other One
Didn’t Have A Clue

All Rarely Talked
About The Solutions They Had
Just About The Other One
And Why They Were Bad

I Couldn’t Escape Them
No Matter The Station
I Just Wanted The Weather
But It Was All Aggravation

First Maggie Would Tell Us
How Bad Don Would Be
And Then Next Don Would Say
The Problem Was She

Then Chris Would Come On
To Say Only He Is The Best
Then Karoline Would Say
He’s Just Like The Rest

They Could Say What They Wanted
To Try And Give Us A Scare
As Long As They Approved Of The Message
No One Would Care

Sometimes I Would Turn
To A Station From Mass
But They Were Yelling There Too
Saying Everyone Else Was An Ass

After A Dozen Or So
Of These Repetitive Ads
I Couldn’t Take Any More
And Was Getting Quite Mad

I Turned Off The TV
And Decided To Rest
But A Knock On The Door
But Me To The Test

There Was A Young Girl There
With Papers And Such
Who Told Me Not To Vote
For Someone Who Was Nuts

I Should Vote For Her Guy
Because He Was The One
Who Would End Global Warming
By Stopping The Sun

I Asked Where He Stood
On This Issue And That
She Hemmed And She Hawed
And Then Decided To Scat

Then I Heard In My Pocket
A Small Buzzing Sound
I Reached For My Cell Phone
And A Message I Found

It Was Someone Unknown
Who Wanted My Dollar Bills
For Their Candidate Who Would Surely
Solve All Our Ills

I Didn’t Reply
And Put It On Mute
Since I Wasn’t About
To Give Him My Loot

I Needed Some Air
I Thought That Would Help
So I Walked To The Mailbox
Then Let Out A Yelp

It Was Loaded With Postcards
Some As Big As The Sea
Full Of Useless Information
About The Faces I Saw TV

Some Were From Groups
Who Supported This
One Or That
While Talking About The Other One
Who Was No Good And A Rat

But There Were Some New Ones
Those More Local And Near
Talking About Their Opponent
And What I Should Fear

He Doesn’t Want That
And He Doesn’t Want This
While Ignoring Themselves
And What They Would Dismiss

The Postcards Were Heavy
I Carried Them To The House
Not To Read Them And Ponder
About Which One Was A Louse

Instead I Went Downstairs
To The Basement Within
And Placed Them With The Others
In The Recycling Bin

Some Will Lose, Some Will Win
And Then We Will Be
Free Of The Negative Spin
And All Yell YIPPEE!

Things Will Be Quieter
We Will Hear Less Of Fear
But I’m Sure It Will Be Back
In Another Two Years